Being a manager is like being a chef in a Michelin kitchen, cooking a New Year’s meal.

If you’re cooking a meal for yourself, you can do it alone. But when cooking a meal for hundreds of people expecting superior quality, doing it alone is impossible.

You need:

Someone to prepare the meat
A cook to prepare the sides
A pastry chef to take care of the desserts
And if you’re serving special drinks, someone must be in charge of that, too

Your job is no longer cooking – it is organizing the experience for your customers and making sure everyone is doing an incredible job.

Similarly, when you start as an engineer, you probably join a small company, solving technical tasks and problems. As the company expands, more engineers come on board, and someone has to think about:

Strategy
Organizing everyone’s work
And solving the problems that naturally occur when you mix different personalities

Of course, that someone is the engineering manager (EM), which could be your new position! This is a tough decision, though, especially since both roles are so different.

So, understanding what changes if you transition to a management role becomes paramount to you making a more informed and conscious decision.

This is what to know.

Common misconceptions about being an EM

There’s nothing worse than starting a new position with the wrong expectations. That’s a fast way to become frustrated with your job.

To prevent that, be aware of these common misconceptions about the EM.

“It’s a technical role”

While the engineer focuses on working with code, most of the time, the EM’s day is very different. You spend very little time doing technical work (and you shouldn’t). Instead, most of your time is spent with people.

Examples include the following:

Organizing them
Coaching them
Helping them stay productive
And so on

Although there are technical aspects to being an EM, coding isn’t one of them.

“Transitioning is easy”

You’ve seen people drive cars since you were a kid, either in movies or in real life. So, you get the idea it’s easy, and you think it’ll be the same when you drive!

But, as it turns out, it isn’t. In fact, driving is much harder than you expected, which is true for management as well.

There are two pieces of good news, though. One is that you can always return to being an individual contributor (IC) if the role doesn’t work out. The other is that there are plenty of things you can do to make yourself successful as an EM.

“You don’t have to serve anyone anymore”

I firmly believe we’re all servants of one another. Not in the sense of forcibly following someone’s orders but in helping and supporting one another.

Your team serves you just as much as you serve them. It’s that humble attitude that makes you and them a winning combination in the long run.

However, that attitude can also put you in a position where it’s easier to be taken advantage of. But someone trying to do this tells you a lot about them as a person and helps you determine who needs more coaching, is worth investing in, and who needs something more serious.

“You’ll be another useless manager”

Just because your work is invisible doesn’t mean it’s unimportant. Your success is measured by how successful your team is, not how many hours you put in or how many tasks you complete.

But, for your team to be successful, they need your help. Truly supporting them means building the necessary processes to improve their performance.

“You need to be the best on your team”

The short version of this is you should be the worst on your team.

You’re no longer an engineer, and you shouldn’t try to be one. Your team has to code, collaborate, and communicate better than you did, and you’re supposed to help them get there.

Supporting them is the best way to guarantee your future as an EM because you’ll show the people above you the incredible results and impact you have on products and people.

“You have to do everything yourself”

Not delegating or coaching your team to correct their own mistakes leads to burnout. It might seem better or kinder to correct the mistakes yourself, especially if you’re busy and it’s a minor mistake.

However, doing so will make you fall behind on your other duties, hurt the engineer’s career, and compound into a very messy situation where you’ll end up doing more and more for one engineer while making others wonder why you don’t help them, too.

5 reasons misconceptions exist about the role

Knowing the misconceptions about the EM role is, of course, important. So is learning why most people believe in these misconceptions so you don’t fall into any of those traps yourself.

Here’s what they are.

1 - The role is not clearly or easily defined

As an EM, your job sits at the intersection of leadership, human, and technical skills. With so much room for interpretation on what you’ll actually do in your role, it’s easy to fall for misconceptions.

To prevent this, learn what you can about the parts of the job that aren’t as clear to you by talking with your current or former EM, for example, and embrace the learning curve as a new EM.

2 - We want them to be true

Doing what someone tells you isn’t usually easy. So, it’s tempting to think when we become managers, we’re the ones telling others what to do.

However, just because we want something to be true doesn’t mean it is. Serving someone means assisting them, listening to them, and helping them excel.

This is actually an essential part of your role, so in fact, you end up serving people more often as a good, effective manager than you did before as an engineer.

3 - Tunnel vision

As an engineer, you likely don’t ask many questions about the work assigned to you – you simply do your job and go home. As an IC, this is a helpful mindset.

But you also lack perspective. You lose a lot of information about other parts of the business, which can fuel misconceptions and make you less prepared for the role of EM.

To overcome this, simply start asking more questions and making an effort to understand the roles, perspectives, and goals of other stakeholders.

4 - Lack of communication

EMs manage many tasks and people simultaneously, so it is easy to neglect communication. This encourages engineers to think they don’t do anything.

Over time, if EMs don’t find a solution to communicate efficiently and supportively, it will lead to frustration among their teams.

They can’t spend all day explaining every decision, but as a new EM, you can and should try to find a balance and build relationships with your team.

5 - Lack of experience

Challenging authority is a part of human nature, but it’s easy to get caught up in the idea that you know better than your supervisors. It’s easy to say, “If I were in charge, I’d do things differently.”

This idea comes from a lack of experience. You can research more about a role for months, but you will only learn what it really means to be an EM once you’re in those shoes.

What you’ll actually do as an EM

As an EM, being everything you need to be at once will be hard. You will have to be involved in everything from hiring to managing technical debt.It does get better over time, and you can always go back to being an IC, but learning more about what you’ll actually do as an EM helps you prepare for the role:

You will be responsible for hiring the best talent: Even though you’re not a recruiter, taking part in the hiring process guarantees you the most qualified engineers.
You’re the reason your engineers become better and stay better: Staying on top of their progress and helping them perform better will improve morale and productivity while reducing turnover.
No one will know your engineers better than you: The PM will turn to you when assigning tasks, and you should know who’s the best fit for each project. As an EM, you will also coordinate and help other departments when needed.
You’ll be the tech debt manager: Engineers seek perfection, PMs seek completion, and EMs seek balance. It’s your job to oversee and reduce technical debt while ensuring everything is delivered on time. You will have to make sure technical debt is a project priority by building clear processes for logging and handling it, for example.
Lastly, master your time and focus: Master the first by being involved instead of always being available and the second by using tools like the Eisenhower Matrix.

The many hats of an EM

Being a manager can feel overwhelming. You will have to change roles more often than you can count and be different things to different people on your team.

For instance, sometimes, you will have to be:

A counselor: Your team members will deal with difficult emotions from time to time, and they’ll need your help getting through them successfully.
A hiring manager: Even though you won’t be head-hunting, you will be part of the hiring process. Learn to read between the lines while interviewing people to determine a candidate's soft skills and personality.
A negotiator: Negotiating conflicts between team members is – or will be – part of your job. Your goal shouldn’t be to find a victory for one side but to reach resolutions and make each party accept responsibility for the conflict.
A technical expert: As an EM, you will maintain your expertise through your team instead of alongside them. You’re not supposed to be coding but learning from your IC’s ideas, progress, and problems.
An interpreter: You’ll have to translate technical language into non-technical language and vice versa to help everyone see the big picture and move forward.

This can be stressful and overwhelming at first, but with practice, you’ll soon be switching these hats easily.

The differences between EMs and engineers

Even though there are some similarities between the roles of EMs and engineers, there are far more differences.

Besides the obvious difference between responsibilities (EMs aren’t supposed to code but organize, evaluate, and coach engineers to improve their performance), EMs also have to communicate more.

While an engineer focuses only on the task at hand, the EM is the communication hub of the team. This requires learning more about people and psychology so you can deal with the natural conflicts that will arise.

Also, the level of organization an EM has to develop is different. While the engineer only has to worry about organizing their work and coding, EMs must organize the team’s work and are held accountable for the team’s results.

Differences between CTOs, PMs, and EMs

Knowing the differences between chief technical officers (CTOs), PMs, and EMs can be confusing, especially in small companies or startups where one person might wear many hats.

To optimize your workflow and build a successful career, here are some basic things to know:

The CTO focuses on developing the company’s tech strategy and seeing that strategy through.
The PM is responsible for feature delivery and planning. They coordinate and delegate teams to ensure goal alignment.
The EM pays attention to the technical aspects of the process, like code quality, software architecture design, and balancing UX design with technical feasibility and complexity, for example.

What to expect from large vs small companies

There’s no right answer about whether working for a large or small company is better. It all depends on what you’re looking for and the experience you want to have.

Larger companies usually give you bigger salaries and career development. Small companies are better when you have an entrepreneurial spirit, want to wear multiple hats, and gain experience.

In larger companies, there are more clearly separated roles and responsibilities and a bigger gap between engineers and top staff. They also have more money to spend on new projects and new hires.

Smaller companies allow you to build closer relationships between everyone and, even though they can only accept a few new projects at a time due to fewer resources, they adapt more easily to change and new market tendencies.

To choose the best career move for you, compare companies, ask people who work there about the culture, decide what you’re looking for, and go from there.

An EM’s mindset

Your mindset determines your results as an EM.

So, be aware of what mindsets are detrimental to you, like:

Thinking it’s someone else’s problem
Hoping things take care of themselves
Giving your responsibilities or problems to someone else to deal with
And firing instead of coaching

Knowing them is key to avoiding them and developing the right mindset instead – being responsible for your team.

You don’t need to wait until you’re an EM to practice, though. You can start as an engineer by looking for ways to positively impact projects outside your control and build a support system to help you do that consistently.

True leadership and responsibility don’t start with a title – they start before that and usually precede titles. So, practice the right mindset by living it even before you’re an EM.

Communication skills you’ll need

As an EM, you’ll be the communication bridge between management and your team. To be successful, master these skills:

Translating: Communicate with your audience in mind. Talking about profits with your team will demotivate them, and talking about technical details with non-engineers will bore them. So, reverse them!
Precision: Being accurate and clear in your communication ensures everyone understands what you’re saying and saves time by cutting off all the unnecessary details.
Aligning people: 90% of the problems you’ll face as an EM come from misunderstandings. The key to solving these is making others see past their own ways and connect with new ideas, processes, and people.
Regulating: Emotions can run high sometimes and get in the way of solving conflicts. By asking others questions, letting them talk about what made them emotional, and then adding your perspective, you’ll help others regulate their emotions and solve conflicts.

Working with emotions

As an EM, your actions have more impact than they had as an engineer. Everything you say and do affects the culture (and morale) of the team and company as a whole, so be gentle and considerate of others’ emotions.

Besides managing your emotions, you also have to create a safe emotional space for others by communicating calmly and openly and focusing on what you can control.

Basically, do what you can without worrying about what you can’t to prevent bad outcomes like engineers quitting or creating a tense environment.

Giving feedback to former teammates

As an engineer, you weren’t concerned with your peers’ work unless it affected yours. But as a manager, you need to pay attention to any difficulties they’re having and give them feedback.

Without it, they can’t improve. So, even though it can be intimidating, your team needs it to grow professionally. Sometimes, people might take your feedback the wrong way, though.

To improve your chances of success, try:

Focusing on asking for solutions to problems instead of pointing fingers or criticizing them.
Focusing more on the problem than on the person or mistake behind it and collaborating to find solutions.
Practicing radical candor and being very honest and open with everyone about what’s expected and needed from them.
Parting ways with grace, if needed, and always clarifying that you aren’t simply a match and it’s not personal. Never blame them or transform an already tense experience into a complete nightmare for everyone involved.

Contributing to projects

Project managers (PMs) and EMs have very different responsibilities, but their work complements and supports one another.

PMs don’t have deep technical expertise, but they coordinate the work across different teams to make sure the job gets done. That coordination involves:

Telling people when to do which task
Learning new information from team members about their tasks
Asking about delays so they can give someone else something to do
Sharing the next steps after a milestone is completed
Adjusting the timeline to make sure the feature is finished before the launch date
And so on

Guaranteeing their plans are doable, organizing engineers and their schedules, knowing which engineer is best for each task, hiring the right people, and helping mitigate risk is something only you, the EM, can do.

That’s why collaboration should be your priority and focus. You can do better work together when combining your different skill sets.

The short version: learn what you need, then make a choice

Choosing to become an EM is a big decision. Whether or not it’s the right decision is something you will only know with time and experience.

However, learning more about the role will make you feel better prepared for future challenges and help you make a more informed decision. Some of the things to keep in mind are:

Common misconceptions about the role: The role isn’t technical, the transition won’t be easy, and so on. These are the truths about becoming an engineering manager.
Why these misconceptions even exist: These include things like wanting them to be true, lack of communication, and more.
Your daily tasks: The actual work of an EM includes helping hire the best engineers, coaching them, managing technical debt, and managing yourself. This means you’ll be taking on additional roles such as counselor, negotiator, and technical expert.
Differences from the engineer role: In short, you’re coding as an engineer, and you aren’t as an EM.
Differences between CTOs, PMs, and EMs: CTOs develop company strategy, PMs manage feature delivery and planning, and EMs oversee technical aspects and engineers.
Differences between small and large companies: Sometimes, changing companies can be exactly what you need in your career. Small companies offer more opportunities, while larger companies offer more money, for example.
Mindset: In short, your team determines your results, so support and develop them.
Communication skills to have: Learn how to do things such as translate to different stakeholders and be precise with your language.
Working with emotions: They’re going to happen. So, create a safe space to communicate calmly and openly.
Giving feedback to former teammates: Giving feedback is difficult no matter who you’re giving it to, but you may have to give it to those you’ve worked alongside previously. So, focus on solutions instead of problems and collaborate with them.
How you contribute to projects: You’re not a PM, but you still help with projects by recommending engineers for various tasks and helping mitigate risk.

You can always go back to being an engineer if engineering management doesn’t work out. But knowing more about the role is one of the most effective ways to know for sure if it’s something worth trying in the first place (and to make you more successful when you do).

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Originally published on Medium.com